I feel like a pig today........... I'm so sad :o(

So today is the day before Christmas Eve
and I feel like i have been starving... so i had 2 cookies early afternoon and 2pieces of small fudge
then lunch was light tuna salad with my 5 grain crackers
then i had 2 pieces of peperoni... Then got to the place i babysit i had half of another cookie, and a few chicken nuggets and 2 hot dogs....and curly fries... i have not ate like that in a LONG LONG time...I'm so ashamed of myself..i also have not been exercising...ugh i feel like i have fallen off the boat..i need some kind of pick me up.. i need to gain NO weight before my surgery in January.. I'm so so so afraid I'm going to gain weight back and they will postpone or cancel my surgery..i would cry, and cry, and cry... i need a Swift kick in the butt..
With Xmas eve and Xmas in a day or 2..i need to NOT eat junk food..and eat only small amount of food....then do wii fit every night when i get home...or every morning... UGH...
I feel so angry...so mad....so fat...why do i do this to myself?!? why????
NO MORE JUNK FOOD FOR TERESA..ONLY LOW CALORIE FOOD AND SALADS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I can't go back to my normal life, i just can't I've lost to much weight to be back and square one...